That’s where the 12 tons of chocolate went. https://t.co/tsWiEEP042
— f1diplo (@thef1diplomat) April 8, 2026
Is anyone interested in a free private jet flight to Monaco for the F1 Grand Prix?
— van00sa (@van00sa) April 10, 2026
Looking for 1 or 2 more people to join.
Paddock access, yacht on the harbour, best seats on the circuit, and we will head to Cannes for some after parties before flying back home.
DM me if…
It must have been so weird to pretend they’ve never met https://t.co/QNkmrWKMkf pic.twitter.com/UKV2D21q9W
— Luke Robert Black 🌳 (@lukerobertblack) April 10, 2026
Am I the only one to be a tad suspicious that the Iran war was started to get Epstein out of the headlines, and now they’re using Epstein to get the Iran war fiasco out of the headlines?
— ALASTAIR CAMPBELL (@campbellclaret) April 10, 2026
Tunnocks got the sponsorship deal again I see https://t.co/0H7xj2HXzG
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) April 11, 2026
The song from the Pepto Bismol advert should be Britain's entry for this years Eurovision Song Contest
— Anon Opin. (@anon_opin) April 11, 2026
Deeply, DEEPLY hilarious that everything on the Artemis II mission worked perfectly except Outlook, a conference call, and, briefly, the toilet
— Leah Crane (@DownHereOnEarth) April 11, 2026
I swear the air gets heavier around 7 pm on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.
— maMvelase ❤️ (@Nocylove123) April 12, 2026
Yeah TikTok is bad for our mental health but what about Outlook and Teams
— S.🎧 (@1ssve) April 12, 2026
Exodus 20:
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) April 13, 2026
3 You shall have no other gods before me
4 You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath
23 Do not make any gods to be alongside me; do not make for yourselves gods of silver or gods of gold
Trump 2026: pic.twitter.com/7eACIj1djt
oh my god. was trump told to tell the press that the image was "doctored," but misunderstood and told everyone that he was depicted as a "doctor"? https://t.co/IHr3y5myha
— manny (@mannyfidel) April 14, 2026
OK Daily Star wins…. https://t.co/RqnXsH4lly
— Feargal Sharkey (@Feargal_Sharkey) April 14, 2026
Not me thinking we were having a funeral… i can't do this with him anymore. the drama is just too much. sleep normally i am begging you 😭 pic.twitter.com/rDgS7gDVHL
— Nature & Animals🌴 (@naturelife_ok) April 14, 2026
Surely I’m not the only one who thinks this every time they see a map of the Strait of Hormuz. pic.twitter.com/wZm8MchGR1
— Kosher (@koshercockney) April 14, 2026
my lukewarm take on married last names is that whichever is the coolest last name should “win” and become the family name
— Alyssa 🌻 (@alyssaleann) April 15, 2026
example: my maiden name was Mars, and I changed it to Hakanson to match my husband
he works for NASA
we chose poorly
A SHORT POEM ABOUT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ENGLISH AND GERMAN…
— Adam Sharp (@AdamCSharp) April 15, 2026
English weather is wet
German weather is Wetter
English kids are kind
German kids are Kinder
English mothers mumble
German mothers Mutter
And the English shout the word people
But Germans just quietly Menschen it
I have issues with your choice of picture…
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) April 16, 2026
I’ve never seen anything more accurate pic.twitter.com/9QcLM1JAzy
— Out of Context Human Race (@NoContextHumans) April 16, 2026
Pete Hegseth Reads Tarantino's Fake Bible Quote From 'Pulp Fiction' at Prayer Service https://t.co/eIgsKFRHbw
— The Hollywood Reporter (@THR) April 16, 2026
Shout out to the USA for showing the rest of the world what it's like when you put the far right in power. Useful research guys, thanks a lot
— Anon Opin. (@anon_opin) April 17, 2026
They should change the name to "Strait of Schrödinger". It's both open and closed at the same time.
— Brian Willott Farms (@BrianWillott) April 18, 2026
My two year-old just opened up The Gruffalo and said
— Jack Blackburn 🇺🇦 (@HackBlackburn) April 18, 2026
“The Gruffalo, by Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler!”
I thought he was a reading savant until he added
“Read by Imelda Staunton”
FINALLY, that’s both of them out of the way. Now it must be MY TIME TO SHINE! https://t.co/4Wb0CCQ4Th
— The Other Murray Brother (@Duncan__Murray) April 17, 2026
The Claudia Winkleman Show has officially peaked pic.twitter.com/vQVNGRxVAy
— sᴜᴘᴇʀ ᴛᴠ (@superTV247) April 18, 2026
ineke.co.uk 
Anything to add...?